Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(323): View more from California

Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?

(1-570): View more from Pennsylvania

you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911

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(813): View more from Florida

Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person

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(864): View more from South Carolina

he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

yo everyone went to the hospital last night

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(631): View more from New York

lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon

(1-631): View more from New York

wow.

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(330): View more from Ohio

I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.

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(816): View more from Missouri

I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.

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(706): View more from Georgia

She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween

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