Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
