he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I look better un-naked...
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Randomize
