just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
