bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize