David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
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