Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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