wat bout pragnant strippers??
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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