I want to have your abortion
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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