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• (517): View more from Michigan

  Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.

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• (507): View more from Minnesota

  security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.

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• (302): View more from Delaware

  He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (407): View more from Florida

  Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.

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• (906): View more from Michigan

  I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down

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• (269): View more from Michigan

  1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.

  (269): View more from Michigan

  7) Noodle arms: engage

  (269): View more from Michigan

  The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed

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  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (937): View more from Ohio

  So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?

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• (216): View more from Ohio

  I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season

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• (386): View more from Florida

  only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad

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• (561): View more from Florida

  Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.

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• (253): View more from Washington

  I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.

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• (425): View more from Washington

  I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again

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