We're like a lot better than the average bears
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
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