i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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