and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
