hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
