i think my tv is drunk
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Randomize
