I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize