is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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