He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
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