Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Randomize
