okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
