Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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