Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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