Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
