Heybabeimwearingurpanties
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
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