he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I got inside last night via doggy door
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
