Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Randomize
