apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
