I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize