who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize