I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
two words: eviction party
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
