we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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