: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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