Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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