if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Randomize
