i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
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