ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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