I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
this will be a night to untag.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize