is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
We have started to decorate penises.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Randomize
