Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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