Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(256): View more from Alabama

he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.

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(256): he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed. http://tfl.nu/1iir

Replies (31) Good night (973) Bad night (7216)
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(404): View more from Georgia

my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.

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(404): my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material. http://tfl.nu/r91w

Replies (15) Good night (12293) Bad night (1189)
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(703): View more from Virginia

I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"

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(703): I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila" http://tfl.nu/s09r

Replies (11) Good night (4842) Bad night (1156)
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(607): View more from New York

please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already

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(607): please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already http://tfl.nu/5kxb

Replies (8) Good night (3020) Bad night (1599)
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(709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.

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(709): i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk. http://tfl.nu/5r6v

Replies (4) Good night (2742) Bad night (1137)
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(402): View more from Nebraska

I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.

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(402): I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us. http://tfl.nu/si4e

Replies (3) Good night (1338) Bad night (595)
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(516): View more from New York

Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.

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(516): Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper. http://tfl.nu/j9dy

Replies (7) Good night (1737) Bad night (650)
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(313): View more from Michigan

I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?

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(313): I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night? http://tfl.nu/g93i

Replies (7) Good night (1704) Bad night (660)
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(207): View more from Maine

you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.

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(207): you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy. http://tfl.nu/cio1

Replies (6) Good night (1749) Bad night (559)
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(207): View more from Maine

we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else

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(207): we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else http://tfl.nu/gty0

Replies (5) Good night (1524) Bad night (593)
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(713): View more from Texas

Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.

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(713): Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon. http://tfl.nu/r8yq

Replies (4) Good night (1465) Bad night (569)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it

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(508): Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it http://tfl.nu/qcg9

Replies (3) Good night (549) Bad night (487)
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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.

(1-570): View more from Pennsylvania

As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.

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(570): If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit. (1-570): As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no. http://tfl.nu/hlm9

Replies (4) Good night (1366) Bad night (533)
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(901): View more from Tennessee

he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.

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(901): he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there. http://tfl.nu/fd7u

Replies (1) Good night (581) Bad night (427)
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(205): View more from Alabama

You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.

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(205): You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while. http://tfl.nu/3e5e

Replies (2) Good night (344) Bad night (747)

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