Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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