Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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