My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
