Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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