in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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