Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
