After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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