Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up