your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Randomize