so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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